New year, new me. I thought that was only my mantra since T.K. left, but it seriously feels like everyone in Attaway has a brand-new high school identity.
Ellie (or Brooke...ugh) is a B now, Quinn’s crushing on Hamilton (I’m not ready for that drama when it all goes down), Kayla’s busy with Flash, Birdie’s MIA, Rooney’s got new friends, and the list goes on. It feels like just yesterday that we were little kids: BFFs and Chicken Girls for life. When did everything change? More importantly, why does everything have to change?
Sometimes, I miss the old days. I saw Ellie at school yesterday and she wouldn’t even stop to talk to me for more than a minute. Since when did the Bs become more important than the Chicken Girls? We used to be sisters. Well, like sisters, not real sisters (sorry Harmony, if you’re reading this. Also, RESPECT MY PRIVACY!). I thought the spa staycation would bring us together, but it only managed to show me how far apart we’ve grown.
Here’s a secret: sometimes I want to go back in time. Last night, when the clock hit 11:11 and I was falling asleep, I wished for a time machine to teleport back to two years ago. Things weren’t so complicated then. I knew exactly who I was, who my friends were, and what I wanted out of life. Sometimes I wish I could just be Harmony’s age. Life is so much easier when you’re a kid. Don’t you agree, Harmony?! Also, GET OUT OF MY DIARY!
But the thing is, I don’t really want it to be like it was two years ago. I mean, there are definitely things I miss...people I miss. When I look at old pictures or yearbooks, it's impossible not to feel nostalgic. But, change is important. I know it is. If life didn’t change, I wouldn’t have joined the dance team last year. I wouldn’t have met Kayla, or gotten closer to Rooney and Birdie. I wouldn’t have started high school, I wouldn’t have auditioned for the play, and I wouldn’t have met Drake.
“It is not in the stars to hold our destiny but in ourselves.” That’s a Shakespeare quote. At least I think it is. Anyway, it fits my mood. Maybe I can ask Drake about it tomorrow at rehearsal.
Rehearsal...Drake...well, maybe change isn’t so bad. I mean, things are pretty exciting right now. I just wish I had the Chicken Girls to tell about it.
New year, new me. Whatever's going on around me, at least I know I'm on my way to finding myself. Wish me luck!